*****WARNING*****This blog post contains graphic sexual content. Reader discretion is advised.
Natalie stretches in her sleep and feels the warmth of Marcus’s chest. That was nice. She let her nose graze his pec and his nipple and then half asleep she kisses his chest, nuzzles into his neck and lets out a little moan as she breathes into his ear. She was in that sleep wake stage where she had just enough body awareness to feel all tingly about having this beautiful man in her bed right now, her Marcus, her person. She thinks she might be dreaming “Mmmmarcus…..my person. You’re it for me…” She says in the dream. She’s fearless in the dream so she admits it all “I’m in love with you…”
Marcus as in bed dreaming, not for the first time, about Natalie. She is whispering words in his ear he’s been longing to hear, even though it's too early. He doesn’t care. In present time his body has been ready for love .. for making love. “Natalia …” he murmurs, feeling her touch in the dream .. in reality. He isn’t sure. “I love you … you’re mine and I am yours…” his body arches under the covers in his need, yet he is still far more asleep than awake.
Natalie feels his movement towards her and hears him telling her words she’s dreamed of before. This must be another dream. She decides to enjoy it, a lucid dream perhaps? She feels vaguely aware. There wasn’t enough peyote or Carlos Castendada to get too in her head about it so she goes into her body, feeling him, her hands caressing him. Marcus is naked under her hands. His skin feels so good to ehr fingers. She slides her leg up his hip. The dream is both emotional and erotic. She can feel her heat mingling with his. She feels the lace of her nightgown and hikes it up. She’s bare under it. Her lips find his and almost like in a sleep trance she kisses him.
Marcus continues to feel her touch and her leg on his hip. He rolls on his side so they are face to face. Not opening his eyes, he finds her lips. “My person. My beautiful Nat…” his hand roams her side to her hip, caressing it and sliding it between them. There he feels himself hard and ready and turns his hand around, cupping her warmth, sliding his fingers between her legs. “I want you. Know it.” he murmurs into her lips. “I need you.”
Natalie hears his voice again and is still not in full awareness or awakeness. She feels his hands and then his body and then his fingers between her legs meet her wetness. She’s been fantasizing. She’s so ready for him. She can feel his hardness and pulls the tip of him to her opening kissing him and murmuring “Make love to me…” between kisses. All the words she holds back, all that she wishes she could just say. She opens her legs more to make room for him, inviting him, needing him.
Marcus hears the words and they convince him that he must be dreaming. They loved their play. He loved settling between her legs to lick and listen to her reactions to his tongue until she came and sometimes plain and simply demanding that he get inside of her. But this … make love … had they ever? Not using those words. “Always … every time.” he feels her guide him into her. Where he needs to be. Arching his hips he slides in deeply and his eyes, that have yet to open, tighten in the pleasure of being inside of her. He sighs in satisfaction. “Nat…” and he begins to move inside of her. Making love to her.
Natalie hears more words, sweet words and then he enters her and begins to move. What an amazing dream. They’re making love and they’ve named it. She moves with him feeling her sensations build. She hasn’t had a dream this good in….well she didn’t even know. As her sensations heighten so does her awareness but it feels so good. She opens her eyes to her mouth on Marcus’s and their bodies moving so perfectly together. She’s almost hit a climax by the time she fully wakes up and lets out an audible moan.
Marcus moves with her, within her. His hand moves to her back, holding her so he can move deeper. The pleasure mounts quickly and he moans, hearing her moan with him. “I love you, Nat.” he groans aloud. He moves faster. He doesn't want to … he wants this feeling to last forever. But it feels too good and he is close far faster than he wants to be, and he begins to come out of the dream.
Natelie was sailing over the edge already when she heard Marcus say the words I love you in her now awake state. It sends her orgasm to a new height. She grips him and without thinking to hard just says it back as she keeps riding the waves “I love you too…” it’s very quiet, a whisper he might miss but it’s out of her mouth in the moment and then she just grips him and moves at his speed, willing him to join her on the waves of bliss and love.
Marcus feels her grip on him tighten and he gasps catching the word love in the moment before she grips him and pulls him over the edge or both orgasm and wakefulness. He bucks deeply inside of her and is still as he cums inside of her. His eyes fly open as he rides it out and at last he relaxes, and looks at her. Its obvious what happened and he wonders how much of his dream was dream and how much was the obvious reality. Blinking he opens his mouth, but only one word comes out. “Morning …”
Natalie looks both sated and a little emotional, in a good way. She felt him come inside her. He said he loved her...she wasn’t sure if he heard her say it back. Dammit Marcus. Now they were here, awake…”Morning.” She says a little unsurely. She runs a bit of shaky hand through his hair and then suddenly pulls him close and just hugs him to her.
Marcus looks at her as she returns his morning greeting. He is thinking about his dream … or what just happened .. and it is a little confusing, especially as he feels like he is swimming in a pool of his own emotions .. and maybe hers. What parts were real? Did it matter? Natalie suddenly hugs him and he hugs her back, moving his head and kissing her neck, leaning her into a lying position and sliding out of her with a groan. Sliding down her body, he finds her nipple and flicks it with his tongue. Dream or no dream he was here with her and so far, no alarm had gone off. He wasn’t sure what time it was, but he wanted to taste this woman. His person .. who loved him … maybe .. unless he dreamed that part.
He hugged her back and she felt a single treat escape, a happy tear. She shuddered when he slid out. It had felt so good with him in and nothing between them. When he moves to flick her nipple she arches her back and gives him better access to it. OK so they didn’t need to talk about it all right now. Marcus could basically do whatever he wanted to her right now and she would still be in bliss. She grips his hair a bit and let out a small moan “I’m yours Marcus …” She murmurs after. “All yours…”
The grip on his hair brings Marcus even more awake. He works his way down her body. They needed to talk. He knew that. But he wanted to reassure himself of something ... and he was still mildly confused, even though that was fading as he tasted her skin. “I’m yours.” he both parrotted and stated. Working his way between her legs, he spreads them and parts the beautiful long hair, looking at her clit a moment. So wet and he could see his own essence as well. Taking a long loving lick, he can taste himself on her. “Oh god, yes. Natalie.” he breathes and begins to play with her clit using his tongue. Normally he’d linger, but what he is tasting sends his senses and mind into overdrive. He plays with the hard nub, then inserts his tongue wanting to taste them … together .. for the first time ever. And it confirmed. They’d made love.
Natalie smiles when he says it back to her and then he moved down on her, tasted her and reacted to it even more than he had before. She knew he was tasting them both on her, in her….she was turned on that he found it so erotic. She’s still at the edge and easily tipped right back over by his reaction and then his intense playing and tongue inside her. She starts lifting her hips and moaning loudly, clearly about to hit another wave. Her emotions heighten the physical.
Marcus relishes in the taste of them and is aware of Natalie about to cum. He opens his mouth and flicks at her clit hard and fast, eager for her to cum because he loves making her cum. From his mouth comes a moan of pleasure. Yes … he was hers .. and she was his.
Natalie’s orgasm hits her hard and she bucks at him, almost screaming. She grips his hair again and with her other hand, his shoulder, needing to feel his skin so badly, needing every point of connection. There’s been a shift in their connection this morning and it’s all so amplified for her right now that she doesn’t know where her energy ends and his begins. She cums nonstop until even though she could go on, it’s almost too much for her being “Stop…” She breathes out but not in upset…...she’s just needing to be done.
Marcus stops the moment she tells him to and immediately climbs up her body to kiss her. It’s a deep kiss and screams his feelings almost as loudly as his voice would. He shares their taste with her and shares it for a long time in the kiss. But finally he breaks it and, panting with his own passion, he opens his mouth. “Yea … morning…” he hovers over her, searching her eyes and her face. It may have been a dream, but he came out of it more sure in his feelings for her than when they lay down to sleep.
Natalie kisses him back with equal emotion and feels tears stream out of the sides of her eyes. She can taste the mix of them and it’s beautiful. She’s also very aware that it’s inside her too…...and maybe they need to talk about that. It was an amazing way to wake up and so loving. Just unexpected. She sees him looking at her like he’s trying to figure her out. She was trying to do the same with him “I thought I was dreaming…” She admits.
Marcus sees the tears and kisses at them as she speaks. “I thought so, too…” he admits and then. “Did …” he was going to ask her if she really said she loved him when he is hit with a reality. He licks his lips, tasting again their mixed essences. “I didn’t wear a condom….” his voice isn’t disappointed … it’s not happy. It’s a bit inflectionless, because he has no idea how she will take the idea that they may at this very moment be conceiving a child.
Natalie had to laugh a bit. They had both had the same dream and ended up here? “Did what?” She’s curious. Did he hear her? She sure as hell heard him but she wasn’t about to back him into a corner about it. She was extremely happy about it though. Then he mentioned their lack of birth control and she nods “I know….I guess when we started we were not awake enough to ….” She rolls or tries to roll them onto their sides “I’m actually not as freaked out by that as some people would be, I have this weird cycle….it might take a small miracle of science to even get pregnant if I tried to pattern it out. It’s like once every few months for longer…..and it might not shock you that I’m even more of a bitch…” She chuckles and then gets serious. “But there’s something else about that and I don’t want you to feel….obligated if it happens unexpectedly. Because I would keep it. I would just do it.” She says honestly.
Marcus blows out a breath. They made love in their sleep. Had sex in their sleep? He rolls on his side and listens to her explain about her erratic cycle and then tell him not to feel obligated. Natalie is brutally honest and he … loves that about her. Running his fingers through her hanr, he caresses her face. “I will always be a man.” he tells her. Thinking for a moment of the father he never knew. “There far worse choices for the mother of my child than you, Nat. I will be there … for you and anyone we create together, intentionally or not.” he tells her with equal honesty.
Natalie smiles “Well it’s hypothetical but that is good to hear. I gave up on the idea of ever having a child with someone after a few partners, including 2 I married telling me in no uncertain terms they NEVER wanted children. And I’d never try to trap someone by getting pregnant…..but I have considered adopting a child or in vitro on my own..” She admits “I don’t mean like tomorrow….just in life. You were going to ask me something before...it started with the word Did?” She’s not sure it’s slipped away in all the big imaginary or potential baby talk stuff.
Marcus understands the hypotheticals. “Well, I’ve had two women abort my baby before they even bothered to tell me about it. I found out from someone else both times. Because they didn’t think I was suitable or .. whatever reasons they had.” he looks at her in something like disbelief. “You’ve seen me with kids. Seen me act like one myself just last night. I love kids and I want kids, Natalie. Just never happened.” he pauses when she asked him what he had planned to say before he realized that he’d forgotten the condom in his sleep. “I … don’t know if I should ask now … given … things …” he bites his lip and considers it. In for a penny, in for a pound. “But I was going to ask … Did I hear you tell me you loved me?”
Natalie looks horrified by what those two women did without telling Marcus. “Holy shit….I support any woman’s right to chose but unless a man’s a rapist, they have a right to at least know…..and hopefully have a conversation about it….and I know you’re not that…” Seh blows out a breath. She gives him a sweet little smile when he talks about kids thinking on some level they should have met earlier. Then he asks his question, which of course she had nudged him to. She looks into his eyes “Well it’s a toss up but I think the words might be scarier to me than the idea of being pregnant. But yes. I said it, after you said it to me….in case that was in your sleep.” She does call him out now even though she hadn’t planned on doing that. Since she’s admitted it though now she does confirm it’s truth “I know it’s soon….but I do love you Marcus Lawry. I’m in love with you.” She says it both ways so there’s no confusion.
Marcus simply shrugs. “That’s you and you’re a very different woman from some I used to be with.” he tells her succinctly. Then she confirms it to him that she said she loved him … and after he did. That part is a little fuzzy, but he knows it's possible. He looks into her eyes. “See .. that’s why I didn’t say anything before. It might be too soon, but … I guess that’s just how it is.” he caresses her face. “Natalia Sokal. I love you and am in love with you.” he blows out a breath. “I’m not sure how long it's been. Shit maybe when I was giving you that lovely tour of the town on your first damn day. But it didn’t make sense to me. Isn’t love supposed to take a really long time? Not like being shoved off of a cliff?”” he scoffs. “But it's how I feel and … if whatever force is controlling this is gonna throw a baby in the mix … I’m all in.”
Natalie looks at him with love and sympathy about the woman that came before her. Her eyes begin to skill over with tears when he tells her with all his sound and waking mind that he loves her and is in love with her. She giggles a bit when he suggests it may have happened during the tour he gave her on her first day. She certainly felt something for him that day beyond just noticing he wasn’t annoying. “My first day huh? You were a very good tour guide…..I definitely felt something by the end of it too…..and I don’t know if love has rules about time. I mean it probably varies person to person or situationally. I’ve been pretty terrible at it in the past. Believe me, I’ll try harder with you….” She inhales sharply when he says he’s all in if there’s a baby and then kisses him deeply, almost more passionately than when he came up from her before and wraps her arms around him. It’s a long kiss, almost dizzying to her and when she breaks apart finally she looks like she’s having a realization “Oh shit...I better not drink for awhile just in case…” she looks half put out but also laughs “Good thing I finished all the good stuff already.”
Marcus smiles as they analyze the hell out of love. That did seem to be a thing for both of them, so he can’t complain about it. Dropping onto his back during the kiss, he loses himself in it. And then Natalie decides to give up drinking just in case and he laughs also. “Well, try and be nice to any lawyers or judges you deal with in the future .. but if you need a whipping boy … look no further.” and he winks at her, spreading his arms as he volunteers himself.
Natalie groans “Not really into whipping or anything BDSMish…” She jokes back. “I’m connected to enough other lawyers and judges and Bittetos I could probably cover my tracks if I had to….and there’s that whole in a loving relationship with a cop thing.” She’s definitely joking now too “I’ll live. I’ll just go to more yoga.”
Marcus laughs at the jokes. He is sure not many see this woman laughing and joking like she is now. It’s incredible and, on his end, he loves how it feels. He pulls her close. “We still have to maintain our professionalism…” he knows he isn’t telling her anything new or surprising. “No yelling it from the rooftops for me …” but he puts on a thoughtful face. Something is on his mind.
Natalie nods “Of course. I’m not so rooftop inclined…” Seh catches his expression “What is it Marcus?” She happily snuggles into him and waits.
Marcus holds her. “Well, you’ve told me that you love me and I’ve told you that I love you, but …. Between my scars and yours … how long before you’re convincing yourself this is just .. adrenaline and I don’t really mean it … so …” he purses his lips. “Can I borrow your phone real quick?”
Natalie looks a little taken aback “Well my goal would be to not give into that anxiety…” She laughs but hands over her phone “Alright...why mine?” Her pass code is back on but she waits for an explanation.
Marcus takes her phone. “There’s a friend of mine I need to tell … but you have her number….” he grins at her. Clearly he wants to call Petra.
Natalie shakes her head and laughs “Alright...no face time with my relatives when we’re undressed. But my code is 1984...not very secure I know as it’s my birth year.” She’s giving permission “It’s a little adorable how attached you are to my Baba.”
Marcus chuckles. “No, I want to leave her a voicemail. I doubt she’ll pick up.” he arches his brows at her passcode, but only shakes his head as he enters it. Then, as it rings, he thumbs the speaker phone until the voicemail picks up. “Hello. This is Marcus Lawry of the Alexandra Police Department.” His voice is the utmost of a professional considering that he is buck naked in her bed. “I wanted to thank you for the recipe and photograph. I prepared the meal and was told that it was acceptable.” he pauses and looks at Natalie. “However, this call is to apologize to you for an inaccuracy I told you when we first met. I told you that Natalia was a friend of mine. That, I’m afraid was incorrect.” his voice maintains its professional pitch. “I’ve come to realize that I love your granddaughter more than I’ve loved any other woman in my life. Of course my own mother and grandmother don’t count. You understand. I just wanted you to know that. I hope to be able to meet you soon. Have a wonderful day.” and he cuts the connection, offering the phone back. “Thanks.” his face remains deadpan.
Natalie nods “She has a landline so her cell will be on the charger in the kitchen at night...and she thinks it will give her brain cancer if it’s by the bed.” When she hears the message he leaves she gets teary eyed again and then hugs him hard after “You realize she’s going to be on the next ferry with a message like that…” She only half jokes before pulling back and kissing him sweetly.
Marcus settles back into the bed with her, chuckling. “Yea. G-Mama thinks the same thing. Cell phones and microwaves.” he hugs her back. “Well I’ll make sure to meet her and bot leave Newcastle to do it or she’ll wind up hunting me down.” He kisses her bak and then does it again. “And I’ll call my G-Mama .. she doesn’t use the cell phone I bought herf, so it’s all land lines. If I call her now she’ll tell me off.” he grins.
Natalie laughs “I wouldn’t blame her...it’s early.” She squints at the clock “Shit the alarm is going to go off in about 10 minutes. I don’t want your G-Mama to dislike me before we meet. But if we get our grandmothers to hang out I bet Baba offers to teach her how to use that phone. She’s been teaching all her friends. Bit of a mix of new and old….”
Marcus reaches over to his own phone and turns it off. “She won’t hate you.” he grins. “I think I’ll invite her to come to Perkatory this weekend or next weekend.” he considers. “Think they could both come on the same day? G-Mama will love Perkatory.” he bites his lip. “Or better, maybe a Sigh in White Rock? More discretion?”
Natalie looks apologetic “I feel bad about asking for discretion until Kira’s trial is done. I would love to have them meet and for us to meet each other's family. I don’t know how it is for cops but when you’re a woman lawyer and you start a relationship during a high profile case it can come back on you...hell even after in some cases….but that time well it was different. I would be more concerned with how it might hamper you. Small towns can be cruel. I’ve weathered a few gossip storms in Vancouver. They blow over faster there because there’s more for people to do.” she smiles “And I do like White Rock.”
Marcus nods. He’d realized that White Rock would be the better choice. “No sorrys, remember? Not for this. I get it, though. I really do.” he’s researched her and knew about her relationship with Vijay Patel and how she got smeared in the press. He doesn’t know how to protect them. He was still one of Kira’s guards and if someone wanted to make it look bad, they could. “White Rock it is. And discretion doesn’t mean I love you less, Nat. Somehow I’ll make sure you know that.”
Natalie leaned in and kisses him again “I think my desire to protect you from assholes with cameras makes me love you even more. I’m not doubting you Marcus. I might have days like that…” She admits “But so far not today.” She chuckles. She knew her own demons well. Natalie was a little curious about his though but not sure what to ask to even start that conversation. The women who aborted his children, well no she wouldn’t be that. The whole ghost thing or spirits thing didn't bother her. Finally she just asked “You know all my shit….what scares you about this so I don’t screw it up without meaning to?”
Marcus nods. “We’ll deal with it when the time comes. I like to think this town is different.” then she asks him about his shit and he bites his lip. “What scares me … is just being a black man in love with a white woman.” he says it simply. “And the people that will have a problem about that .. on either side of it. And with the current climate …” he shrugs. “At least we’re not in the States.” he like his lips. “I honestly don’t know how G-mama will react. My father wasn't black and that’s a problem sometimes. I’ve never brought a white girl to meet her, but I only dated one and that ended … well she was one of the ones who aborted instead of talking to me about it or telling me at all.” he sighs. “The people Iknow won’t care. They’re not the ones who scare me.” he shrugs. “Agaon, I’m just glad we’re not in the States.”
Natalie nods slowly “That did cross my mind as something that might come up, especially the first night we got together after the protest. I’ll try my best to always strive to be an ally. I know it’s not remotely the same but being Jewish gives me a tiny flicker of perspective. I don’t wear it on my skin….no one knows unless I tell them. And I’m not saying it makes me understand what any Black and/or Indigenous person goes through as a lived experience. And I am glad we’re not in the States. I’ve had a variety of diverse humans in my pool of relationship stuff...but only the more long terms ones met my family…..and uh only the” She hesitates “Male ones….wow I just realized that.” She laughs.
Marcus listens to her and nods. “I know a lot about the history of Jews in the Americas in general and Canada in particular.” he gets it. At the end he grins. “So …. No girls met Petra?” he tilts his head. “I didn’t know you were bi…” he doesn’t look upset about it nor overly pleased. It was just something he didn’t know.
Natalie ponders the whole thing. “I’m not actually sure I’m bi either. I don’t know what I am. There have only been two women. One,,,,” She flashed her tattoo briefly “Miranda did my tattoo. She had this way of getting me to talk….turned out she was another survivor. She had left Trinidad to get away from it all...I feel like we fell into it for maybe the wrong reasons. It didn’t stick...but years late she sent me a thank you card for connecting her with a counselor. She had met someone amazing, a woman...and it was working. So I’m glad it went that way for her. I wasn’t really seeking another experience with a woman. You’ve probably noticed….I like having sex with you...making love with you...it works for me...like insanely.” she laughs a little and actually has a little blush.”The other woman was not such a good person. It was revenge. I’m actually not totally proud of it….” She breaks off as if worried Marcus will think less of her. He seemed to have a higher moral code naturally.
Marcus listens and nods when he makes the connection to her tattoo artist and smiles a bit learning that she found someone amazing also. He chuckles and kisses her forehead hen she talks about how much she enjoys their lovemaking. He arches his browns at the story of the other woman. “A revenge fuck? Ouch.” he winces. “I know how people an get when they’re mad, Nat. Just … please … if I ever piss you off that much … let me know .. or shoot me or something. That shit’d break me, I think. Not that I’m close enough to anyone tha your fucking then would hurt more than just beause I want to be your one and only.” he shrugs.
Natalie sighs “Well now I have to explain it because you’re getting the idea I cheated on someone...or something. I didn’t and I’ve never done that...had it done to me. Alright….so my firm, Samuel and Sons….we represent the Bittetos. They’re a complicated entity and uh they have a few enemies? Critics let’s say. Another firm, the DeLucas as I discovered wanted to try and expose them for corruption, by going through someone at Samuel and Sons….The Deluca in question was Rene...Renato Deluca and he picked me. He used me and gave me the impression we were involved, to get close enough to see what he could dig up. This was not long after Miranda and so when I told him about my previous relationship he did the cliche thing of assuming he could have two women at once because he thought I would be into it. He was really a little...more than a little gross about it. Then I found him going through my case files and threw him out. So the next day I went to his office to tell him off. But he was out. And I ended up talking to his sister Lina, another partner in the Deluca firm. She didn’t think too highly of Rene's antics at all. We went for lunch. There was a lot of wine. I was still really pissed off….so when she flirted with me, I flirted back, I might have even started it. She knew. She called me out on it but she wanted to go ahead anyway. I texted Rene after reminding him of his obsession about getting me with another woman...and then told him I slept with his sister. I’m awful I know….but it just happened.” She looks sheepish “You said you wanted total honesty right?” She gulps a bit.
Marcus listens with rising eyebrows. “Holy shit.” he sighs. “Rene souls like a class A ass hole. I understand better why you did it. It was shitty, but I get it. Especially after a lot of alcohol involved.” he rubs her arm. “If it helps the two women threesome thing doesn’t do anything for me, but I don’t share. And yes.” He kisses her shoulder. “I want that honesty, so don’t ever stop.” He sighs deeply. “Speaking of stopping … I need to go get ready for work. I know I’ll see you there but it’ll be different. Which is what I’m signing up for being your man.” He knows the deal and he can accept it. If it means being with her, he can do it. He kisses her softly but for a long time and gets ready to get out of bed and head home to shower, shave and get to work.
Natalie looks relieved that he both understands about her little revenge fuck, which she knew was petty, and about his not wanting a threesome. Marcus points ever increasing. She looked a little sad that their morning had to end but she had been preparing for it as well “I know...me too.” She kisses him back slowly and tenderly, saving the last one they’d have together until much later. She liked the way he said signing up for being her. Marcus made her feel like she and they could face anything together. And as she thought about everything they might have to face she was grateful for the love and integrity he brought to her life. He was truly meant to be her person.
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