Noelle Snow couldn’t help but smile at her son, Blaze as she lay him on the couch in Daisy Dale’s studio apartment to nap. She loved him more than she ever thought she could love. Possibly the only thing that pierced her heart was his hair. It was unquestionably his father’s hair. But at least he had her eyes. Not to be confused with his half-sister.
She then went into the little bedroom and checked on Olivia Dale, Blaze’s half sister. The kids were less than 24 hours apart in age and Noelle hoped that, when it came time for them to start school, it wouldn’t be a problem.
With a sigh, she quietly made a pitcher of lemonade and headed out to the porch outside Daisy’s door. Daisy would be getting off work soon and they might be able to talk, for a change. They didn’t always get along … having gotten pregnant at the same time by the same man. Winding up in the same building had been the cruelest of coincidences.
There was a table and chairs here they would usually sit in awkward silence until the kids woke up and Noelle could take Blaze upstairs. But it was a nice table and chairs. Seamus Reinhardt had gotten it for them back when purchases were still done in trade. She set down the pitcher, sat in one of the chairs and waited, enjoying the afternoon.
Daisy walked home with her small purse slung across her, blonde hair piled in a high ponytail and her usual sweatshirt, jeans and runners. Her mascara looked like it had run and her eyes were a little red. She saw Noelle sitting and the little table and looked humble, very humble. She didn’t say anything at first, she just sat down and tossed her puse on the table like she was very tired, emotionally and physically.
Noelle heard Daisy coming around the building and saw her when she finally tossed her purse on the table and sat. In her usual attempt to at least make nice with her once good friend, Noelle looked at her. “The kids just fell asleep. Hard day?”
Daisy looked up and got teary eyed “I had a fight with Shay…...and I was stupid…..” She sniffs a bit and looks down like she’s ashamed of herself for something. “Thanks for getting Liv to sleep.”
Noelle arched her brows. To her knowledge, Shay and Daisy never fought. Fucked … sure. But not fighting. “What over?” she wonders. “I mean you haven't even seen each other in WEEKS.” and then she nodded her you’re welcome.
Daisy inhaled and pursed her lips and then closed her eyes and exhaled “You….I mean I told you I was being stupid. He’s so…...he gets around and I was just sure. I mean you’re pretty….and you talk to him…” She shook her head both laughing and crying “But he told me now. I know he’s a slut but he’s never been a liar.” She blew out another breath and looked up at Noelle “I am sorry….”
Noelle tensed at the word ‘You’, but then she listened more and got an idea what the fight had been about. “Oh … so he finally told you he’s never fucked me?” she asks, mildly.
Daisy just nods, sobbing quietly “Why am I so stupid for him? Fuck…..” She tries to catch her breath before she spirals into a state as she can sometimes do.
Noelle watches her with a slight look of pity. “That’s a really good question, actually” she realizes. “I mean .. you said you were just friends … you know with benefits.” she bites her lip. “Is .. he more than that to you? I mean … are you two now .. like … real?” She finds that hard to believe, given Seamus Reinhardt’s reputation … and finds that ironic given her own reputation, which is completely undeserved.
Daisy wipes at her face and sees the makeup coming off on her sleeve “Shit. I don’t know. He doesn’t want to. I tell him I’m fine with it...because it means I’m not driving him away. But Noelle I don’t always know. It’s nice to be close to him….I like the sex too.” She laughs “Maybe it’s not so bad this way.”
Noelle has known Daisy for a long time and they had shared crushes with boys in the past. The most significant of which had been Joey Piccolo. So she thought she knew how Daisy thought. “You tell him you’re fine with it because it means not driving him away … but you want more?” she grins a little. “Sex you can like sounds like a good thing.” she hasn’t been with a man since Joey. “I mean .. maybe he’s just … I dunno. I’d say scared of …. You know … but his reputation is probably worse than ours.” she snorts. “I mean … look at his family. I heard even Owen has a girlfriend now …. More … So …. Maybe there’s hope?” she is reaching .. not because she thinks it's impossible, but because hope in a relationship is something she hasn’t had since before she got pregnant.
Daisy giggles “Well he is good at it. It’s distracting. I need to stop overthinking. Shay always says that...I don’t know how to turn it off. And yeah Owen has a girlfriend and she’s PREGNANT!” She gossips now fully “And she’s like way older than him too….like 10 years...Owen? Mr Klutz boy…..” Now it’s like Daisy was back in high school. Slinking up to Noelle’s locker with a You’re not going to believe what I just heard juicy story.
Noelle nods her agreement with Seamus. “You really do.” she agrees. “Enjoy him while you have him, not many girls….” but then she is snatched into something like a time machine when Daisy mentions that Owen’s girlfriend is pregnant. She leans forward on the table, her hazel eyes wide. “WHAT? I didn’t hear about THAT? And 10 YEARS? Oh. My. God.”
Daisy beams. It had been too long since she and Noelle did this “I know right! I missed you Noelle. Can I have some of your lemonade?”
Noelle smiles. “I missed you, too.” she says sincerely. “I really did.” She pours the lemonade. “It’s not mine. I made it for US. I’ve been hoping … we'd you know .. make up.” She sets the now lighter pitcher down and rubs at the small faint scars on her forehead, a permanent reminder of Joey Piccolo’s temper, then snatches her hand away. “I always forget.” she blows out a breath. “Dais…. I know it’s been a long time … but I want to say I’m sorry about Joey. He told me you were nothing and I bet he told you the exact same. ‘It’s nothing’.” she bites her lip. “Which reminds me …. I was GOING to say … if the rumors are true .. Shay fucks and forgets most girls. Twice … maybe three times … all except for YOU.” she shrugs. “That’s why so many of the girls around our age … act how they do around you…”
Daisy looks truly touched and nods “Me too…” She noticed the scars again. She had noticed before but hadn’t asked. She frowns “Joey told me a lot of things...most of which were lies or tools to manipulate and control me. I’m sorry either of us got pulled in. But you know what? We have great kids. I don’t regret them for a second.” She looks thoughtful about Shay “That almost makes it harder...the fact that he keeps coming back to me. That he’s in Olivia’s life...like a boyfriend would be….it’s like an almost…” She trails off and sips.
Noelle smiles and sniffs. It took them so long to stop being angry and petty and just … be adults. She sighs when Daisy says it's almost worse. “Almost like what?” she wonders, because she never even asks for help. Chris Peterson was always asking to help her, but she always said no, unless she was forced to admit the job really was too much for her. She looks at Daisy curiously, waiting for the reply.
Daisy just tips her glass as she makes her point “Almost like what…..that’s what it is. It’s never a complete...anything. I don’t even know. But apparently I’m just going to keep doing it because almost feels better than nothing. It feels better than Joey….or my mom or….just nothingness….I’m not good at being alone..” She inwardly chastises.
Noelle sighs. “Then let it feel good. He’s obviously a friend … and I guess friends fuck too?” she wouldn’t know. “And you’re not alone.” she reaches for her hand. “I’m here and we’re back and Blaze loves his half sister to death.” she shrugs. “And if Shay doesn’t realize he’s a father figure … then he really is a clueless jock.” she rolls her eyes. “So let him be a clueless jock. He’s still a better father to Olivia than Joey would have been.” she bites her lip. “Does Olivia see him as …. You know …. Call him .. you know ….” she doesn’t know what she would do if someone got close to her kid like that and then bailed. Not that Shay had bailed, but Noelle didn’t have faith in ANY man to stick around, never mind Seamus Reinhardt bad boy.
Daisy's eyes fill with happy tears at Noelle’s words “You’re not alone either. We are back….bitches!” She laughs a little and wipes at her eyes again with her sleeve “God my makeup is just full on racoon eyes isn't it?” She shakes her head “No, Liv calls him Say, but I can see she loves him...and I’m pretty sure it’s mutual. I mean god he hosed her down in the tub after two diaper blow outs in a row…..that has to be love!”
Noelle blinks aay her own tears. “It doesn’t matter. You’re home and we love you even if you go WITHOUT makeup.” she teases and then she nods, looking a little shocked. “He DID?” She looks a little stunned. “OK, that’s it. You know what I’m going to do? I’m going to call Owen and ask him a couple of questions.” she suddenly looks sheepish. “He keeps asking if he can help me … like with groceries and shit and I keep snapping at him. But he never stops being nice. Maybe Shay is a closet decent guy. But I’ll call Owen. Apologize and maybe ask a question or two about Shay. Would that be okay?” she doesn’t want to overstep. Not now that they were closer again.
Daisy sips and smiles, looking like she feels a little better. She even teases her old friend “You like snapping at nice boys….and yes Shay is one. So’s the ever helpful Chris….. What’s the deal there?”
Noelle froze and blinked. “Chris? Chris Peterson? What’s Chris have to do with anything?” she demands. “He’s .. annoying. Always trying to help me like I’m a cripple or something.” she huffs and doesn't realize she is blushing. Of course, Daisy might mean some OTHER Chris .. like .. Chrostophoros Zabat, her boss .. when there wasn’t a pandemic.
Daisy almost spits out her lemonade “Wow you’re really adamant…..and a little flushed.” She throws up a hand “He’s doting on you. Enjoy it...I mean have you seen him Noelle? He’s fucking gorgeous.” She giggles.
Noelle shakes her head. “No .. I mean … Yes, I’ve seen him. How can I not? Every time he sees me, he insists on talking to me … and to Blaze, if I’m with him.” she blows out a breath and takes her glass of lemonade. “I know he’s gorgeous. And nice. And sweet. That’s not the POINT, Dais!” and she drains the glass.
Daisy just sips now, giving a knowing look and trying not to laugh. Finally she says “You have my sympathies…..” with a note of sarcasm. “Let’s binge watch something after the kids are down….a movie marathon or some trashy TV….”
Noelle sighs deeply. “I’m not like you, Daisy. I’m not strong. And I don’t want to be found, fucked and forgotten by Chris … or any other man. Ever again.” then she brightens. “That sounds nice. Maybe after Blaze is asleep AND after I talk to Owen .. or do you not want me to call him?” she wonders, since her friend decided to try and blindside her away from the idea.
Daisy shrugs “Oh call him. I don’t mind. It’s Owen. For the record I don’t get that sense from Chris…..I mean I don’t know him that well...but those twins are just so…” She gives an overly sweet smile and points at her dimples “Apple pie and boy scouts!”
Noelle snorts and gapes at her friend when she gives her opinion of the Peterson twins. She opens her mouth to protest when the door to Daisy’s apartment opens and Blaze comes out, rubbing his little hazel eyes. “Mama. Hungy.” he moves to her and rests his head on her leg. She almost snatches him up. “You’re hungry baby. Well let's go and get dinner started.” she looks at Daisy. “I’ll be down around ten, alright?” and all but flees up to her apartment … and away from any more Chris talk.
Daisy makes eyes at Blaze and waves and then picks up the lemonade things. Noelle would see it someday. The way Christopher Peterson looked at her like the sun rose and set on her. In truth, Daisy wished for that with Seamus because for her the sun only shone in him.
Noelle took her son upstairs, but before she fed him, she read him some stories she had traded for. Now that the world was back, she wanted to save money and maybe really fix up their place. But finally, she fed him and played with him until he was worn out and ready for bed. At 7pm, she tucked him in and read him a story. By 7:15 … he was asleep. She cleaned up the dinner dishes, then the kitchen and finally went into her living room, sitting on the couch, pulling out her phone and using her old contacts list to try and call Owen Reinhardt.
Owen was flopped out on the couch after work and supper watching random TV and dozing a bit. He needed to stay alert for his later call with Slaine so he did his usual trick of downing a coke and popping in a stick of cinnamon gum. He would not sleep on this one. As he perked up RD2’s shreik let him know someone was calling. Bit early for Slaine’s time….He blinked. It was Noelle Snow. Curiously he answered.
“Hello?”
Noelle heard his voice and bit her lip for a second. She didn’t see Owen much anymore, but … pandemic. “Hey Owen. It’s Noelle. You got a minute?” she asks as if she called him every other day and not … never … at least not since their Alexandra Academy days. Not before she got pregnant and certainly not before the rumors started. Not to do more than wave, if he waved first … and to snap at if she was overburdened with packages and he offered to help.
Owen’s gum chewing could be heard through the phone and he sounded happy to hear from Noelle “Yeah sure. What’s up?”
Noelle paused. Owen sounded so happy. But he was always lighthearted, she seemed to remember. Back then, she was happy too. She had changed. “I just wanted ….” she begins. “I just wanted to apologize to you for the way I’ve treated you the last time I … well the last two times …. “ she blows out an exasperated breath. “For how I’ve been the last … hell … the last three or so years, I guess. I’ve been a defensive bitch and you never deserved it. So I wanted to apologize and say I’m happy to hear about your girlfriend and baby. Couldn’t happen to a nicer guy. Really.” there she’d been nice and not bitchy.
There’s a pause from Owen’s end where you can just hear slow gum chewing and then he exhales “Noelle. I wasn’t pissed at you or anything. You’ve had some shitty times. Besides, have you met my sister?” He laughs “Thank you, truly. We’re cool though you and I. Are you ok? This isn’t like some kinda 12 step program or something?” He seems a little confused by the need for the apology.
Noelle laughs with Owen. “Shitty is sort of an understatement.” she tells him. “But I have Blaze now and he makes up for everything.” The love that she has for her son can probably be felt through the phone. “And Fiona .. she’s kinda .. scary. I always thought so.” she chuckles a bit. “No … I’m not in Bitch Anonymous. I just … me and Daisy made up after all these years, and it got me to thinking about how, when it all started … I lost everyone, really. And I’ve been … scared to get close to anyone for any reason. I want to be strong, so Blaze will have a mother he can look up to. That won’t happen if I’m pushing away anyone who says even a kind word to me, yanno?” she thinks for a second about chris … and basically shoves him out of her thoughts. She might apologize to him too … but later … much later. Start with sweet, goofy, clumsy Owen and work her way up.
Owen is truly touched “I’m glad you reached out. And that you and Daisy are cool again. I can’t imagine bringing up a kid all by yourself. I can hear how much you love him...Saline talks like that about hers…..” He sighs a bit “And hey I might need to bug you and Daisy for advice so I don’t look like a total noob dad….i mean whatever I’m going to be. You’re doing awesome Noelle. No Bitch Anon required.”
Noelle smiles. “Blaze is my world. But don’t let me go on, cause I will.” she arches her brow. This Slane had a kid already? Just wait till Daisy heard. “Well you have me right here right now. What do you want to know? I mean you already know how to make one and be a man about it.”
Owen almost chokes on his gum as he laughs nervously. He’s guessing Noelle can almost see the blush from her place. “I guess my anxiety is about things like...things that are out of our control….the sudden death thing….I have an ex who had a kid who had some kind of heart thing and died….I mean knowing all the bad things….and we’re not even through the first trimester….how do you not just fucking lose it?” He admitted fully. Owen had been reading, maybe too much lately.
Noelle listens and nods, even if no one can see it. “Yea … that’s … don’t read that stuff, Owen. It’ll keep you up at night and when the baby comes you’ll be terrified of every little germ in the world. Stick to things like what the baby is doing at whatever week you're at. And think about seeing the baby when the sonogram time comes … and hearing the heartbeat … and learning the sex, if you want to. If you worry about things you can’t control … you’ll go nuts.” she blows out a breath. “I was pretty stressed. Dr McKinney sort of lectured me, because I didn’t even come in to see her until I was already showing. My second trimester. I was too scared to before. By then my dad had thrown me out and I was living with Lydia Alvin and trying to just finish high school and decide what I was supposed to do. You know .. get a decent job and at least a diploma. I knew there was no point in even telling Joey, but he found out and confronted me and … Now I get to look at those scars.” she blows out a breath, feeling like she’s gone off on a selfish tangent. “I’m going to assume that you’re healthy. That she’s healthy and so your baby will be healthy. So relax .. believe me you need that sleep now, before the middle of the night feedings and constant diapers.” she laughs.
Owen smacks his gum and agrees “I went down a few panic rabbit holes. And shit Noelle I didn’t know the half of that. Your dad….you said scars? Did Joey...hurt you? When you were pregnant?” His voice got an edge of anger to it as he went on….. She tripped that day...or so she said. He remembered it.
Noelle giggles. “It is a lot more than just rocking back and forth knitting booties.” and then she falls silent. “Yea …. He backhanded me in the art room. He dragged me in there to see if the rumors were true. I told them they were and … in the end he backhanded me into an easel and took off.” she sighs. “Never lie, Owen. You’re bound to forget them in time and be busted by an old school friend.”
Owen could be heard walking around. He spit his gum out loudly into the garbage under the sink after the cupboard door opened with a little squeak. It closed again with a thud and he muttered “Motherfucker...I should have held him down for Vincent so he could have punched out all his stupid teeth.”
Noelle bites her lip. “That’s very sweet. I saw that fight, you know. The one where Vincent got suspended? It’s actually what made me keep my mouth shut about being pregnant … and what Miss Spanner did later? Ya .. that's a lot of why I didn’t tell anyone, not even the doctor. But thanks for saying it. I don’t have a lot of defenders. Maybe just Blaze.” she chuckles a bit. “So … how are you besides the pregnant girlfriend? How’s Fiona … and Shay?” she finally found an opening for the playboy Reinhardt.
Owen smiled a bit but still retroactively despised Joey Piccolo and Mrs. Spanner “Ugh….” was all he could offer to it. “Hey three year olds can be pretty mighty.” He puttered around the kitchen and another cupboard opened. The sound of something being set down on the counter and then the cupboard door closing and a drawer opening which rattled a bit like it was possibly a cutlery drawer. The clink of a spoon being set in the bowl confirmed that. Then another cupboard, a rustling and the unmistakable sound of cereal being poured into said bowl. The fridge opened and then shut, the creak of the floor and then milk was poured in and Owen’s mouth by the phone made a little crunching sound as he took a bite. His mouth still a little full he answered “MmmmFone’s gang mayed…..” He swallowed “Shay’s good. They’re both better….Shay, Fi and Vincent all had Covid eh?”
Noelle giggles. “He’s my little warrior. Or I’m his.” she listens to the preparation of food and then tries to understand what he’s saying. Then she nods. “Yea, I heard. I’m glad they're better.” she pauses again. “You know Shay still … sees .. Daisy, right?” The word ‘sees’ seems right. Cause … they see a lot of each other, or did before the quarantine.
Owen is chewing again while she talks and then pauses to swallow “Uh yeah?” He questions back like he doesn’t understand her question. The spoon dives into the cereal again as he waits for more information. Where was this going?
Noells rolls her eyes. “Well what do you think about it?” she demands. “He’s in Olivia’s life and I know she doesn’t call him Daddy or anything, and Daisy claims it's all casual but .. still ….”
Owen sets his bowl down shifting uncomfortably from foot to foot. He had his opinions. But he sure as hell wouldn't throw his brother under the bus “Uh…..how does Daisy feel about it? I kinda feel like this is their deal Noelle…” His tone is careful.
Noelle considers the words. “She goes back and forth.” she admits. “I just …” she sighs. “I guess I worry. Especially now. But … you’re right. I should mind my own business.” and if she did, Daisy might mind HERS and they would never have to speak about Chris Peterson ever again. “Well, he’s your brother and all of you guys are in good relationships .. love and all that shit. But yes .. I’m going to mind my own business on this one. Thank you for straightening me out.”
Owen sighs “Noelle I’m not judging you for wanting to protect your friend. I’m biased too...with Shay...of course. And the romantic in me says what the fuck dude? Just be with her….but we’re not them...and we can’t choose for them…” There, he admitted it. Shay knew his point of view so he hoped that didn't come back on them badly.
Noelle listens while staring up at the ceiling. “I know, right?” she more than half sighs. “And I can’t talk. Ugh.” she stands and goes to look out of the blinds at 1st street. “And Shay won’t hurt her. He’s a good friend to her and thats all my bullshit anyway.” she turns her attention back into the house. “I’d better go. I’m supposed to go downstairs for some adult time with Daisy and I wanted to make her some avocado toast or something to snack on while we do. She keeps forgetting my diet and drowning popcorn in butter..” she giggles. “Thanks for accepting my apology … and good luck .. if you need anyone to calm you down about the baby … you know where to find me.” and she prepares to end the call.
Owen tunes into some of Noelle’s more subtle statements within the mix. He doesn’t push, he just notices and comments “You say you can’t talk...but Noelle if you want to...I’m here ok? I mean you’re talking to someone who’s perpetually been a bit of a fuck up in relationships...so yeah if there’s stuff…...but I won’t keep you from your avocado toast either….” He gives her an option and an out.
Noelle smiles faintly. “Thanks, Owen. For everything. But, believe me … I’m the Queen Fuckup in relationships.” she doesn’t want to get into it and curbs her jealousy. She has Blaze .. and he is all she needs. “You take care .. of yourself and your family. Bye.” and she clicks off.
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